when u win an argument against someone who thinks they know everything
reblog if your dick is longer than your arm
(seductively licks lips)
(grabs your wrist)
(furiously hits you with your own hand)
WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF WHY AR
"its dark im scared"
dont worry bae i got this
*sketchers light up*
you ever wanna fuck the living shit outta somebody but also cook for them and make sure they’re emotionally stable?
“why don’t poor people just get a job?”
we all used to have 0 followers so don’t be an asshole to people with less followers than you
‘hi i haven’t talked to you in five weeks but we’re still best friends’: a story about me and human interaction.
if youre sweaty and you try to touch me i will call the police
unless you’re hot then its ok you can touch me WHENEVer you want